


Win This Fight Tonight

by roseverdict



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, I HOPE YALL LIKE SNATCHER JUST GOING STUPID GOING CRAZY, Oh the Humanity AU, does it count as graphic depictions of violence, hmmm, if time rewinds right before it happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:54:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24297688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseverdict/pseuds/roseverdict
Summary: Snatcher is stuck in his old human body. Hat and Bow are missing. Mustache Girl knows who did it.Who needs eldritch powers when you have an umbrella, a hat, and countless years of protective emotions to catch up on?(aka the one rosie wanted to write as a little drabble but it spiraled DRASTICALLY out of control.)
Relationships: Hat Kid & Bow Kid & Snatcher & Mustache Girl
Comments: 10
Kudos: 168





	Win This Fight Tonight

**Author's Note:**

> *cracks snuckles*
> 
> the afit server is full of enablers and the oth!au is by mak, aka tumblr user @doodledrawsthings
> 
> and that's all i gotta say about that

The ship was quiet.

Well, maybe "quiet" wasn't the right word. The engines still hissed from time to time, keeping the ship in orbit. The vacuum still bumped into walls and consoles and "relics," occasionally crying out in robotic surprise before moving on. Snatcher's footfalls still sounded _far_ too loud in his ears as he paced.

Maybe "empty" was a better word.

"The kids should've been _back_ by now!" Snatcher muttered, glancing away from the carpet in favor of the planet in the front window. "What's _taking_ them so long…?"

It was just supposed to be a quick trip to the Metro, they'd said. They'd be in and out in just a few minutes, they'd said. They were just grabbing the last few costumes and badges, _they'd said!_

It had been an hour.

Snatcher's stupid human heart was beating far too quickly for his liking, so he groaned and flopped back in the captain's chair, careful not to hit any buttons.

They were probably fine.

_(Hat Kid had mentioned a bounty on her head when she'd returned from the Metro the first time.)_

They'd been able to kick _his_ butt when he was at his most powerful! A few mangy cats should be a walk in the park for them!

 _(Bow had been inconsolable once it'd sunk in that "the cute kitty-cats" really_ had _wanted them dead.)_

He was…he was just overreacting! Yeah! _Everyone_ knew human brains did wacky chemical things! He _totally_ wasn't worried! His body just hadn't gotten the message yet!

When the captain's chair started creaking, Snatcher realized he'd been uncontrollably bouncing his leg, and hard enough to rock the chair, to boot!

With a wordless cry of frustration, he leapt to his feet and strode up to the gargantuan window, glaring at the planet below as if doing so would beam the kids back up.

It was a good thing he did, because otherwise he wouldn't have seen the screaming child _blasting right for the ship-!_

Snatcher jumped back and scrambled to open the latch before the kid could crash through the window. The second he did, he dodged to the side to avoid getting barrelled over by the incoming intruder.

He scowled. "Hey, aren't you that Mustache Brat?"

"I refuse…to answer…to that name…" The girl huffed, rolling over onto her back to catch her breath. "We've…we've got bigger problems."

" _We?_ " Snatcher snorted. "Kid, there is no _'we,'_ got it?"

"Not even when Hat and Bow are in danger?" Mustache Girl pushed, standing up on wobbly legs and sliding _something_ sparkly back into her cloak.

 _That_ got Snatcher's attention.

" _In danger from what?_ "

Mustache Girl finally looked at him. "The _Empress,_ who…else…wait." She squinted at him, trying to reconcile the voice of the infamous "Soul Snatcher"/Hat Kid's "BFF" with the frankly-unassuming man in front of her.

" _This_ is a need-to-know basis thing, _kid._ " Snatcher rolled his eyes and gestured to himself. " _You_ don't need to know, but I suppose I just have to get your silence on it?"

It wasn't a question. Not really.

After a moment, Mustache Girl shook her head as if to jostle away distractions. "Alright, whatever. Sure. _Anyway,_ I was on my way to cause some trouble for those Nyakuza cats in the Metro when I caught sight of _this._ " She held out a photo, and after making sure it wouldn't exorcise him or something, Snatcher gave it a closer look.

Three of the Nyakuza were bundling a large sack into a generic truck.

One of them was wearing a blue ribbon wrapped around their arm and tied in a bow.

One of them was wearing a purple top hat.

The third was struggling to close the sack, and from the angle the photo was taken, Hat Kid's face could easily be seen.

…as well as a dark streak of _something_ trailing down the side of her head.

Snatcher's stupid human heartbeat was pounding in his ears again.

"In the Metro, you said?" He asked, handing the photo back with a deadly calm.

"Uh, yeah?" Mustache Girl answered, though it seemed she was a bit confused at his reaction.

That was fine.

He didn't want to waste his energy here and now, _especially_ when he had so little left of it to use.

He stalked towards the bedroom without a word, somehow managing to keep from feeling ridiculous when he had to drop on all fours and crawl through the tunnel.

"Wh- _hey!_ " Mustache Girl shot after him. " _Where are you going?_ "

Snatcher refused to answer, instead straightening up in the bedroom and making a beeline for the closet. "And I thought they were being foolish at first…hah!"

He snugged his mailcap to his head and swung his umbrella into the open.

Mustache Girl drew up short. "Wait, wha-?"

"Hookshot, Laser, and Hover?" Snatcher asked himself. "That should be a good arsenal…can't believe I needed these Metro passes after all…"

"Wait, you're going after them yourself?"

"Of course!" Snatcher replied, smile a bit too wide as he clipped his umbrella to his belt. "Now, you should probably head home and do whatever it is you do when you're not judging the world from an ivory tower."

"Are you _kidding me?!_ " Mustache Girl snapped. "Contrary to what you may believe, _I actually care what happens to them!_ I'm going too, and you can't stop me!"

Snatcher wanted to stop her anyway. He _really_ didn't want to get _help_ (ugh) from _the girl who'd rewritten reality and tried to judge them all_ (UGH).

But if she could find a way to rewrite reality before, she might find one again if he denied her.

He wanted to deal with _that_ even less.

"Oh, _fine._ Let's go murder some cats." Snatcher finally ground out.

〜〜〜〜〜〜

"You're _sure_ it was this alleyway?"

"Yes, now _shush!_ "

Snatcher bit back his snarky retort at the last second. Getting into an argument with this kid was _not_ going to help their cause.

Hat Kid would be proud. Snatcher _did_ have some self-control!

Instead of the sarcastic quip that was _sure_ to get a rise out of his accomplice, he settled for a quiet, "Well, if that's the case, we're gonna need another lead, kid."

" _I know that!_ " Mustache Girl hissed. "Argh! They could be _anywhere_ by now!"

Snatcher tuned her out and glanced around. Hadn't Hat Kid mentioned a store the 'Empress' used as a front for her illegal activities? They just had to find it, and they'd be all set, wouldn't they?

Countless signs, sounds, and scents assaulted his senses.

Finding the front business might be harder than he'd thought…

…but it was still a lead.

He glanced down at Mustache Girl and smirked. She was still going at it, and likely wouldn't have stopped for a while yet, but he poked her shoulder. "Cool it, hotshot. One of these stores is a coverup for the Empress. Find the Empress, find the kids."

The look on Mustache Girl's face when he said that was too _open_ for her, too _vulnerable,_ but she didn't give him time to register it before sweeping off down the sidewalk. "What're we waiting around here for, then? Let's get a move on!"

Snatcher lifted an eyebrow, but stuck his hands in his pockets and walked after her.

"What's the place even supposed to look like, anyway?" Mustache Girl asked, glaring at every storefront they passed. "A food truck? A train pass kiosk? A fast food restaurant?"

Snatcher _almost_ missed the needle in the Metro haystack.

_Almost._

He slowed down without looking away, grabbing Mustache Girl's hood so she wouldn't wander off.

" _Hey!_ What're you-?" Mustache Girl's protests trailed off as she caught sight of the store.

A fancy, high-end jewelry store in the middle of the Metro? Police tape littering the ground around it?

A _dead_ ringer for the Empress, according to Hat and Bow's descriptions of her?

_Bingo._

The Empress was with another customer when they'd stopped in the middle of the Metro, so she hadn't seen their determined little nod to each other.

She only noticed them when they walked in a few moments later.

Snatcher offered her a venomous smile, drawing on every ounce of near-forgotten court etiquette in an effort to remain civil. (He didn't need word getting out about his "condition," after all.) "Our _sincerest_ apologies, but we seem to have lost our friends somewhere around here. Might they have wandered in here?"

The Empress didn't even flinch. "I'm afraid I haven't seen anyone here who wasn't interested in my wares. Aside from _you,_ of course."

"Of course." And oh, before _Vanessa,_ he'd never been one to get angry, so he'd thought "seeing red" was just a _metaphor!_ "Well, if you happen to see a child in a purple top hat and another in a green dress, please tell them their friends are looking for them."

Snatcher felt a smug sense of satisfaction when the Empress's good eye twitched. She cleared her throat. "…and, who, pray tell, is looking?"

The customer took their chance to run. Good. One less person to distract him.

Mustache Girl hopped up onto the Empress's countertop with a bright smile. "None of your business!"

Snatcher smirked and nodded. "Oh, yes, it really is rather _smart_ to not tell you who we are. But I assume you now understand why we're here?"

"Quite clearly." The Empress's fake smile twisted into a grimace as she leaned down to her microphone.

_"There appears to be a hooded child and a mailman after our 'special guests.' A quarter-million for each of them."_

Mustache Girl gasped, affronted. " _Did you just-?_ "

" _She did._ " Snatcher snapped, whipping out his umbrella and jabbing it at the Empress. "No more games! _Where are they?_ "

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about them if I were you." She purred. "I'd be _much_ more worried about yourselves."

As if on cue, several of the Nyakuza charged at them, shouting shrill battle cries.

Mustache Girl grinned and darted closer, zig-zagging between them to make them crash into each other. She swiped a bat from one of them and swept the feet out from beneath the next, following through with the motion to do some _nasty_ damage to a third's kneecaps. The bat's original owner swallowed, but couldn't dodge the incoming concussion, and they fell to the floor, limp.

Snatcher's smirk widened, though he didn't take his eyes off the Empress. "Nice job, hotshot."

The Empress, on the other hand, looked ready to blow a gasket. "You're _her,_ aren't you? The judgemental little _freak_ who flooded this Metro, _my Metro,_ with lava!"

Snatcher only said what he said next because they didn't have time for Mustache Girl to lose it. Nothing more, nothing less. "Oh? If _she's_ a freak, then what am _I?_ "

The Empress glanced back at him in confusion.

She looked him up and down.

"Some overconfident delivery man, I'm assuming."

"Wrong." Snatcher leaned in close, pouring every bit of hatred he could into his face and preparing to deliver a witty quip-

_SHNK_

The Empress's claws popped into view, and he had to jump away to avoid getting slashed. Even with adrenaline flooding his system for the first time in centuries, he still couldn't quite move fast enough.

Blood dribbled from the cut on his cheek.

If he hadn't been seeing red before, that would have done it.

Too furious to think up a new one-liner, he decided to reuse one instead.

"Oh, that does it! _Time to die!_ "

He lunged at the Empress, fully intending to spear her on the end of his umbrella, but she danced away and ducked behind the counter. Before he could comment on the surprising show of supposed cowardice, she stood back up with a crazed grin and a rocket launcher.

Because of _course_ she had that on hand.

Without losing momentum, Snatcher whirled around and sprinted for the door, grabbing Mustache Girl by the arm and swinging her up onto his back by instinct. His umbrella slotted back into place on his belt, and _thank the stars for that!_

" _Woah-!_ "

The missile whistled _extremely_ close behind them.

He dove to the side, slapping the right Metro pass down against the scanner as he passed and scrambling into the nearest terminal. The rocket screamed past them and hit an unoccupied bench, scattering shrapnel across the Metro.

"I'LL FIND YOU! THIS METRO IS _MY DOMAIN!_ "

Snatcher rolled his eyes and muttered, " _Clearly_ knowing your domain isn't as helpful as it sounds. I mean, just look at me!"

That drew a laugh from Mustache Girl. "The Mafia never did find my hideout, but Hat Kid found it in less than a day!" She sobered up at her own words. "I hope she's okay…"

"I thought she was your sworn enemy or something." Snatcher pointed out, leaping over a gaping chasm and grappling to safety on the other side.

Mustache Girl didn't answer for a moment, but when she did…

"…she was my first friend before being my enemy."

Well then.

Snatcher wasn't sure what to say to that, so he eventually just went with, "That's rough, kiddo."

"Gee, _thanks._ " Mustache Girl groaned.

Snatcher chose not to comment on her arm rubbing the back of his neck (and likely her face). Instead, he hiked her up a little higher and dove across the tracks ahead of them. "I don't exactly have eyes everywhere down here, so you gotta keep a lookout for that crazy cat, got it?"

Mustache Girl nodded and twisted around, her namesake tickling the base of Snatcher's skull. "Got it."

Snatcher sprinted through a station, smacking Nyakuza cats out of his way, and charged into a tunnel wide enough for two trains.

Wait.

Hadn't the kids mentioned a-

_MRRROOOOOW!_

Snatcher jumped to the side to avoid the incoming train, only for the blood to rush from his face at the sight of _another_ one barrelling towards them.

"Oh boy, _hold on tight, hotshot!_ " He shouted over the cacophony.

"Wait, why-?" Mustache Girl started, only to shriek as the next train bore down on them.

Snatcher wove between the trains, managing to jump to safety in another terminal. He took a moment to lean up against the nearest wall and catch his breath.

Stupid human lungs.

Once he was sure his chest wasn't about to explode, he pushed off and got a better look at the surrounding area. There were fewer Nyakuza cats nearby, and those that _were_ there were clearly second-guessing their chances against the guy who just avoided getting run over by a bunch of trains _while carrying an entire child on his back._

" _Please_ tell me we won't have to do that again." Mustache Girl squeaked.

Snatcher glanced around and stifled a groan. "Couldn't tell ya. Looks like we're being herded somewhere, though, and I don't like it."

Sure enough, the Nyakuza cats were starting to regain their courage, and even though they were advancing, they left an opening wide enough for Snatcher and Mustache Girl to escape.

Specifically, _they left an opening when they had more than enough cats and space to fill it._

"Well, it's not like we can go anywhere else, right?" Mustache Girl said.

Snatcher had to admit, she had a point. He nodded, but the moment before he started running again, his eyes lit up. "Wait, I have a better idea. I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner, stupid human brain-"

He hopped into the air, not _nearly_ high enough to call it a jump, and with a puff of smoke and the revving of an engine, he summoned the mail scooter and _hit the gas._

Mustache Girl yelped (and maybe Snatcher got a kick out of startling her- served her right!) and tightened her grip. " _Stop_ scaring me like that!"

Snatcher's cheeky grin grew to an unrivaled size. "I'm sorry, did you just ask _me_ to stop _scaring you?_ "

" _SHUT UP AND DRIVE!_ " Mustache Girl snapped, swinging her stolen bat behind them to smack away a too-close Nyakuza.

"Oho, we're _so_ not done with this." Snatcher snarked, but he still floored it.

They wove between cats, trains, and cat-trains in their attempt to find someplace to regroup and work out a better plan. Nyakuza stalked them at every turn, leading them in circles without giving them a chance to try and get their bearings.

It wasn't until they were forced down an alleyway and into a derelict part of the Metro that they started worrying.

"Quick, in there!" Mustache Girl cried, pointing at a seemingly-closed-down warehouse coming up on their left. "We can lose 'em inside!"

Looking at the mob of Nyakuza approaching from the far side of the street, Snatcher nodded. "Not usually smart, but we're out of options! _Hang on to your hood!_ "

Mustache Girl yelped as he hit the gas and swerved into the building, knocking down the door without slowing down. The lights were out aside from one spotlight on the far end. It was shining down on _something,_ but neither of them could make out what it was beyond "a lumpy sack."

Stupid human eyes.

Snatcher swallowed. "Say…the Nyakuza cats haven't come in after us yet."

He was right.

There was chittering and laughing from outside, as if the two would-be rescuers were about to be the butt of a cosmic joke, but not a single cat tried to go after them.

Aside from Snatcher's scooter and their breathing, it was dead silent inside the warehouse.

"Just…just out of curiousity, do you think you'd be able to find this warehouse again if you had to?" Mustache Girl squeaked, her voice an octave too high. "Without all the circling, I mean."

"Probably?" Snatcher answered, just as quiet and more than a little concerned. "Why…?"

And then he saw _it._

The Empress had beaten them there, and she strode into the light with a self-assured smirk. "Ah! You're here! That means I can take _this_ off!"

She reached down and took hold of the sack, and with a flourish, she ripped it away and tossed it in the air.

Hat and Bow flinched away from the sudden motion, but Hat's eyes lit up at the sight of Snatcher and Mustache Girl. She elbowed Bow to get her attention, and both of them tried to beam at Snatcher and Mustache Girl.

"Tried to" being the key words.

The duct tape on their mouths and the dark streaks of _something Snatcher REALLY didn't want to identify_ trailing down from their hairlines kinda ruined the image.

"Now I get to see the light _and_ hope drain from their eyes!" The Empress snarled, and she lifted one paw, her claws fully extended. She snapped her fingers. "Nyakuza, keep them from interfering."

Cats burst out of the shadows and tackled Snatcher and Mustache Girl, and they were forced to watch as the Empress reached down to Hat Kid with one razor-sharp claw and-

" _NO!_ "

Snatcher whirled to look at Mustache Girl, who had dug something bright out of her cloak.

" _NOT TODAY!_ "

_SMASH!_

〜〜〜〜〜〜

The rocket screamed past them and hit an unoccupied bench, scattering shrapnel across the Metro.

"I'LL FIND YOU! THIS METRO IS _MY DOMAIN!_ "

Snatcher stumbled as his memories reasserted themselves, but kept running. "What was _that,_ hotshot?!"

"My last resort!" Mustache Girl declared. "We _gotta_ beat her to that warehouse!"

" _Way_ ahead of you, kiddo." Snatcher smirked, summoning his mail scooter and speeding for all he was worth the moment he swung across the same abyss as before.

The Nyakuza cats that gave chase got an extra helping of baseball bat as they shot past, but Snatcher didn't _dare_ slow down for anything.

Not even the extra-wide train tunnel.

_MRRROOOOOW!_

"Once we get out of this tunnel, it should be a straight shot there!" Snatcher shouted, dodging between the incoming trains without missing a beat.

"Got it!" Mustache Girl yelled back, tightening her grip on the back of his shirt.

They rocketed off the track and screamed out of the station, leaving Nyakuza and bystanders alike in their dust.

This time, they shot through the waiting hordes of Nyakuza, making them dive out of the way or risk getting run over.

This time, they didn't get led around in circles, instead powering ahead until the warehouse came into view.

This time, they broke down the door to the warehouse just as the Empress got close, and they skidded to a halt beside Hat and Bow with a few seconds to spare.

Snatcher dispelled the scooter and yanked the bag off the kids' heads. "You two alright?"

Hat Kid nodded, her eyes sparkling. Once Snatcher got the tape off her mouth, she turned to Mustache Girl. "You used your Time Piece…to save us?"

"Oh, so _that's_ how-"

Mustache Girl stiffened, but still got Bow Kid's tape off. "W-well, why _wouldn't_ I? I hate the Empress as much as I hate _you!_ Maybe more!"

Bow Kid just rolled her eyes.

Before they could get much further, the door that hadn't yet been destroyed slammed open, and the Empress stalked towards them. "I don't know _how_ you beat me here, but I _do_ know that _none of you are leaving my Metro alive._ "

Snatcher scowled and reached for his umbrella. "Hotshot, keep untying the brats. _I'll_ handle the Princess."

Mustache Girl nodded, and the Empress's good eye twitched. "The… _Princess?_ "

"Well, of course!" Snatcher smirked, giving his umbrella a little twirl. "Y'see, I have a bit of a _bad track record_ with snotty, power-hungry, obsessive, _controlling_ princesses who try to take what isn't theirs, so I figured it fit."

The Empress growled and leapt at him, claws outstretched.

Snatcher side-stepped the attack and slammed his umbrella into her back, knocking her off-balance and sending her forward a stumbling step. Snatcher went in as if to stab her with the umbrella, but as it was _just an umbrella,_ it just turned into the most vicious poke in the history of the world.

That's not to say it wasn't painful.

The Empress hissed and spun around in an attempt to swipe Snatcher's weapon from his hands, but he drew it back and whipped it across her face. Her head snapped to the side, and Snatcher grinned. "What, can't take a simple 'mailman' in a fight?"

The Empress lifted a hand to her jaw and moved it around a little, working through Snatcher's blow. " _Clearly,_ you're no mailman."

"Oh, you figured that out?" Snatcher's grin grew vicious. "Does that mean I can tell you what I _actually_ am now?"

"You'll tell me whether I agree or not." The Empress grit her teeth and straightened up.

"You're _darn right_ I will!" Snatcher cackled. He dodged away from another of the Empress's attacks and 'stabbed' her again. "I'M YOUR _WORST NIGHTMARE!_ "

"OI!"

Snatcher spared Mustache Girl a glance, and she gestured for him to follow her. "We're all set, let's _go!_ " Behind her, Hat and Bow had each donned their sprint hats and summoned their scooters.

Snatcher nodded and kicked the Empress's legs out from under her, spawning his own scooter and doing a quick donut to rub their escape in a little before hitting the gas. He snagged Mustache Girl as he passed, hefting her back into position.

The trio of scooters burst onto the road and raced for anywhere but the warehouse. The speakers scattered throughout the Metro crackled, the Empress's voice distorting through a tinnier-sounding microphone than the one she kept in her store.

_"THE BOUNTY ON THE MAILMAN AND HOODED CHILD IS DOUBLED! HALF A MILLION FOR EACH OF THEIR HEADS!"_

"Ooh, listen to that, hotshot!" Snatcher snarked. "They like us!"

"Let's just get out of here!" Mustache Girl huffed.

Hat Kid nodded. "Once we get to an open enough space, I can beam us back onto my ship!"

"The square!" Bow Kid gasped. "That's open enough, right?"

"It _better_ be!" Mustache Girl yelped, pointing behind them. " _We've got company!_ "

The three scooter-drivers glanced behind them and gulped in unison.

More Nyakuza were chasing them, _and these cats had commandeered food trucks._

_And they were slightly faster than the scooters._

Snatcher looked back at Hat Kid, his pulse skyrocketing. "Better get ready to beam us up _asap,_ kiddo!"

"Already on it!" She had already whipped out her phone, glancing between it and the road in front of her so fast her ponytail nearly whacked her in the face.

"Almost there!" Mustache Girl called, smacking away an overambitious Nyakuza cat.

The square was coming into view, but it was absolutely _teeming_ with Nyakuza. There wasn't enough room for them to even get into the square, and there was even less for them to try and turn around.

They were being funneled into a virtual dead-end, and they knew it.

"Whenever you're ready, Hat!" Bow shrieked, her eyes going wide as they screamed down the road.

"Almost…"

"I can't watch!" Mustache Girl ducked her head into Snatcher's back, probably screwing her eyes shut.

" _Almost…_ "

" _KIIIIIIID!!!_ " Snatcher yelled, staring at the rapidly-approaching wall of cats.

" _GOT IT!_ "

The world around them flickered, and Snatcher got the sight of a terrified Nyakuza cat mere inches away from him burned into his mind before the pillow pile in Hat Kid's room took their place.

They shot forward, slamming into the cushions and sending their scooters back to wherever-they-went with matching screams.

Those screams turned into exhilarated laughter as the four of them clawed their way back to the surface, and Snatcher felt the adrenaline coursing through his system _finally_ subside.

He wiped a tear from his eye and flailed his way back to solid ground. "Alright, kiddos, let's get a good look at you."

"We're fine!" Hat Kid protested.

Bow Kid snorted. "We're really _not,_ though. We should probably get some band-aids, at _least._ "

" _Fiiiiine…_ " Hat groaned. She waded back out of the pile with Bow on her heels.

Snatcher lifted an eyebrow. "I'm talking to you, too, hotshot. I _refuse_ to believe you got out of that unscathed. Now get outta that pillow pool and join the rest of us."

Mustache Girl didn't leave the pillows for a moment, but when she did, the far-too-earnest expression had returned, bolstered by the way she held her arms behind her back. As if to counteract it, she grumbled, "I don't even think Hat Kid _has_ any first-aid on this stupid ship."

Snatcher blinked. Was she purposely keeping her arms hidden?

"Oh, ye of little faith!" Hat bemoaned, dramatically throwing her hand to her forehead and drawing a giggle from Bow, both ignoring the winces from the action.

Snatcher frowned. It seemed the kids hadn't noticed Mustache Girl's secrecy.

It was up to him.

_Stupid human emotions._

He lifted her cape to expose her arms, as well as all the claw marks scratched across them. "I sure hope you weren't planning to keep these from us, hotshot."

Mustache Girl looked away, furious tears gathering in her eyes. "I-I would've said something!"

" _Suuure_ you would've." Hat drawled. Grabbing Mustache Girl's sleeve at the shoulder, she dragged her out the door. "C'mon, if _I_ need to get patched up, then so do _you!_ "

"I most certainly do _not!_ "

"Ohhh, _yes_ you do!"

Bow twiddled her fingers for a moment before looking up at Snatcher. "Pick me up, please?"

Snatcher rolled his eyes, but obliged. "Only cuz you're hurt, kiddo."

"Thank you!"

_Stupid human heart._

**Author's Note:**

> now if anybody needs me i'm gonna go brush my teeth bc i think i just gave myself a cavity with this self-indulgent little one-shot


End file.
